Introducing the Minnesota Timberwolves Circle of Infamy
Many professional sports franchises have a way of recognizing the great accomplishments of people who have been involved with the organization over the years. For the Minnesota Vikings, for instance, it is the Ring of Honor, a list of names that circle the Metrodome honoring the many fantastic football players and coaches that have been part of the organization.
Alas, such a concept wouldn’t work for our beloved Minnesota Timberwolves. Having no signature achievements to point to in their 20 years of existence, it makes more sense to honor the unique non-achievements in the team’s history.
As such, All Shook Down is proud to introduce the Minnesota Timberwolves Circle of Infamy, where those who have truly made a mark over the last two decades can receive their just rewards. Nominees for the Circle of Infamy are below. Please vote for your favorites. The top five vote-getters will be given further special recognition upon their induction into the Circle of Infamy.
Christian Laettner: Laettner is emblematic of the Wolves’ lottery luck (or lack thereof). The team finished the 1991-1992 season with the worst record in the NBA, then watched as Orlando and Charlotte leapfrogged the Wolves in the lottery, enabling those teams to take Shaquille O’Neal and Alonzo Mourning, respectively. As the third pick, Laettner never became the player his extensive college pedigree suggested he would become. And his cocky attitude, best represented by the infamous “loser, loser, loser, winner” speech he gave in the locker room, necessitated his eventual departure half a season after Kevin Garnett was drafted.
The Draft Class of 1997 (Paul Grant and Gordon Malone): The single-least productive two-person draft class in Wolves history, and that’s saying a lot. Grant, a seven-footer out of Wisconsin, was hampered by recurring foot injuries. He missed his entire rookie season and made his NBA debut half-way through the the 1998-99 season, playing in just four games before being shipped to Milwaukee as part of the Stephon Marbury trade. Malone, meanwhile, was considered to be a friendship pick by Kevin McHale, selecting a client of his pal, NBA agent Bill Duffy. Malone never saw any NBA action, and has been drifting through the netherworlds of minor league basketball ever since.
Ndudi Ebi: Perhaps it’s somewhat unfair to Ebi to be on this list. The real blame, one supposes, should lie with Kevin McHale for selecting Ebi in the first place. But Ebi, like Grant, was a first-round pick who made no meaningful contribution to the team, playing a total of 86 minutes in 19 games over two seasons. The sting of the Ebi pick was only compounded by the fact that Kendrick Perkins and Josh Howard were taken in subsequent picks, and Ebi was the only first-round pick the Wolves had during the Joe Smith sanctions.
Foreign White Guy Three Point Shooters (Shane Heal and Igor Rakocevic): Target Center crowds have been captivated at two points over the last two decades with spunky but otherwise irrelevant three-point shooters. Aussie Shane Heal spent the 1996-97 season with the club, flashing his Zack Morris hair and a knack for shooting the long ball. Making it was another story, as Heal only converted on 30% of his threes (and 27% overall from the field). In 2002-03, the Wolves were treated to the basketball stylings of Igor Rakocevic. Rakocevic made 41% of his threes, but was largely a bench-rider and trudged back to Europe at the end of the season, where he has legitimately become one of the better guards on the continent.
Kevin McHale: The Hibbing native and Celtic legend has sullied his reputation with the locals based on a record of disastrous personnel moves. If I need to list them all here, you haven’t been paying close attention.
Randy Wittman: Wittman has long ties to the organization, joining in 1994 as an assistant coach to Bill Blair. After five years with the Wolves, Wittman got a shot a being a head coach with the Cleveland Cavaliers. Two years and 62 wins later, Wittman was back on Flip Saunders’ staff, departing after the 2004-05 season for a one-year stint with the Orlando Magic. One year later, Wittman was back with the Wolves as unofficial coach-in-waiting to Dwane Casey. Forty games into the 2006-07 season, with the Wolves at 20-20 and in 8th place in the Western Conference standings, Casey was fired and Wittman promoted. Wittman’s Wolves proceeded to lose 30 of the next 42 games and missed the playoffs by 10 games. Following the KG trade, Wittman guided the Wolves to a 27-85 record before being put out of his misery early in the 2008-09 season.
Eddie Griffin: Griffin was a troubled soul, dealing with drug and alcohol addiction his entire career (culminating in his death in 2007). Perhaps the most notable event in Griffin’s three years with the team was the SUV crash he got in 2006, where he allegedly hit a parked car while masturbating to a porn movie playing on the SUV’s in-dash DVD player.
Isaiah “J.R.” Rider: Rider was another Wolves player withan “interesting” personality. One of the most talented players ever to wear the Wolves uniform, Rider stormed into the league in the 1993-94 season, racking up a berth on the All-Rookie first team and winning the Slam Dunk Contest with his infamous between-the-legs “East Bay Funk” dunk. Off the court, though, Rider racked up an impressive list of transgressions, including kicking a female manager of a Mall of America sports bar, marijuana possession and using an illegal cell phone. After three seasons, Rider was shipped to Portland for Bill Curley and James “Hollywood” Robinson.
Rashad McCants: McCants, in many ways, was a lesser version of Rider. Fewer run-ins withthe law (good thing), and less talent (not so good). The less talent piece of the equation made his surly and distant attitude difficult to deal with. On the court, McCants was up-and-down, frequently looking disinterested and was not considered a good team player. After three-and-one-half seasons of mediocre play, McCants was traded to Sacramento for Shelden Williams and Bobby Brown. The emergence of Danny Granger (taken after McCants in the 2004 draft) as an All-Star talent also did not endear McCants to the Wolves fans.
William Avery: Avery, along with Elton Brand and Corey Maggette, were among the first notable players from Duke to leave early for the draft. The Wolves selected Avery with the 14th pick in 1999, becoming the last of four Dukies taken in the first round. Avery washed out of the league following his three year rookie deal with the Wolves, and based on the results, it’s not difficult to see why. Avery played just 142 games in those three seasons, averaging 2.7 points per game and shooting 33% for his career. Avery is now playing for his tenth European team in seven years overseas.
Vote Now!
Voting has closed. Thanks to all of you who voted. Results will be released shortly.
